Sunday, February 20, 2022

Cause for pause

 We've been there --- the angst, anger, and absolute frustration with who, from our perspective, we label "the bad driver."  

Personal receivers of this moniker are the one who drives very slowly in the passing lane; all who forget the wonder of the turn signal and how to use it; and, of course, all the lovelies who use their car as a mobile telphone booth, office, make-up counter or kitchen table....and sometimes do so simultaneously.

Recently, however, I've heard from friends who have shared chilling encounters with drivers in the midst of serious road rage ---- the screming obscenities; the prolonged and very pronounced raising of the middler finger; the long and loud horn honk; and even, most chilling, the enraged driver who after tailgating you moves into the lane besdie you and glares at you while mimicking firing a gun.  

The other day in the midst of a steady rain, I got behind a car and noticed this bumper sitcker: 

NEW DRIVER: PLEASE BE PATIENT

I paused.

I had a "Driver Grinch Moment" and "felt my heart grow three sizes that day...."

As the light turned green and there was a long (way too long) pause before said driver moved, I was calm, pleasant, waited peacefully.

I reflected, what if there were other stickers, buttons, shirts,  or ball caps that one could wear to re-mind persons of with what one is currently dealing and to please be patient and understanding:

  • Scared....Please Be Patient
  • Worried....Please Be Patient
  • Grieving....Please Be Patient
  • Stressed....Please Be Patient
If one wanted to, one could even add more specifics.  Although, just the basic emotion could lead to conversation and connection...."Me too."  "Who are you grieving?" "Anything I can do?"

When I would be hyped-up and stressed and usually having those emotions released by yelling at my sister or my brothers and I would get into a tussle, my mother would say, "Kind and gentle, Sally, kind and gentle." The re-minder worked, I eased, breathed, gentled.

Personally, I need to continue to hear those words, to channel my mother's gentle being and to remember we each are dealing with something and as one of my self-advocates shared, "Be kind and patient to one another cause each of us are either beginning something, in the middle of something or coming out of something." 
Well said.  May it also be well lived.